An open letter to Michael Dell

Mike -

May I call you Mike? Because I feel like I can, but please correct me if I'm wrong. I just feel like it's time we had a little chat.

Do you remember when I bought my very first laptop? How the internet wouldn't work no matter what settings it was on? And how, when I called for tech support, I was connected to your little office over in India? By the way, thank you for that voice recognition technology that allows the thick Indian accent to be "translated" into a Texan accent. It made the conversation *SO* much easier to understand. Regardless, we got that fixed, so no big deal.

And then, do you remember the time when I was paying for my laptop and my interest rate skyrocketed to almost 30%? Fortunately I was in a position where I could pay off my laptop and not mess with the interest rates, so again - no big deal.

Oh! And what about the time when the computer just kept CRASHING? Do you remember that? Probably not, because instead of calling tech support, I just had my big brother do whatever he does to fix computers. (aka: Hacking) At this point, I was a little miffed, but my brother returned my computer good as new, so I got over it.

I will NOT blame you for the time I dropped the laptop and shattered the LCD screen. Or whatever happens to the screen when you drop it. But I ordered a replacement screen off eBay, mailed them my computer, and they fixed it and mailed it back to me within 48 hours. That was 100% my fault, but wanted to throw it in there.

However - what happened over the past month - specifically the last week - has pretty much done it for me. I got a nice 20% off coupon for ANY product ordered through Dell, so I got Larry a Garmin GPS for Christmas. I ordered this product while I was recuperating from surgery on November 14, wrapped it up, and put it under the tree. Little did I know - Larry had gotten ME a Garmin for Christmas, and we decided we only needed one. I wanted to return my Garmin to Dell. Little did I know that there is a 21 day return policy. Period. Even if the box the product was shipped in hasn't even been opened. I found this out after 3 phone calls and 40 minutes. The first phone call, I couldn't understand who I was speaking with, but was very patient and waited for them to "access my information." Until I got hung up on. Then I called back, and the system didn't recognize my account number, so I was transferred to 4 people, including the manager, who never answered. So I called back again. I somehow was routed to Tech Support, although to give that guy credit, he is the only one who helped me. Needless to say, we now have a GPS in both vehicles, so at least we will never get lost.

But if you ever wonder why your stock has fallen to $10/share, you might want to re-read this little letter. Just saying.



Amanda said...

I heart Apple. I'm just sayin'...

Anonymous said...

Yikes - Knock on wood my experience with them has been great. Three years later and no issues (again knocking) with my computer considering the number of times I've dropped it, carried it by the monitor, ripped the cord out violently....etc.

Maybe you just got a lemmon? The return policy is total crap. Bummer.

sarahsmile3 said...

My next computer will be an Mac. I know they are expensive but you get what you pay for.

"Miss Bee" said...

Isn't that what student loans are for???

Adam said...

Hackers rule.

Amy said...

Love this! You didn't get a lemmon - Our current laptop is a Dell and we've had TONS of trouble since day 1. But seein' as it's only a year-and-a-half old and the AF didn't seem to think enough of my husband to promote him yet, we'll just wait until it totally crashes and hope we backed everything up on the external.

"Miss Bee" said...

Amy, I'll settle for the Dell as long as no promotion = no 3rd tour in Iraq!