There are a lot of good things about me. I like myself. But I have come to terms with the fact that there are several things I'm not.
I am not silly.
I'm the practical person. Children do not flock to me, as I encourage "inside voices" and drawing with chalk over dressing up as exotic sea creatures and throwing slime on people as they walk by. I don't even really "get" Monty Python. I'm trying to remember the last time I was just plain SILLY and nothing comes to mind.
I am not spontaneous.
I'm a planner. I like lists. I like agendas. I like having at least a general idea of what might occur in any given situation.
I am not meant to be in the spotlight.
I love being in the background. I really do. I don't feel left out and I honestly, truly, enjoy refilling your cocktail and cleaning up after you. (well, to a certain extent...)
Which is why my memory of singing "Don't Let the Sun Go Down on Me" by Elton John/George Michael at a karaoke bar in Marseille, France, is so precious to me. I was there for 3 days, with a woman who did not speak any English. She loved going to sing karaoke and took me with her and MADE me sing. Since I was several countries away from anyone I knew, I obliged. The Elton John song was pretty much the only song I recognized in the booklet, hence the choice. All I knew was the chorus, but I made it work. But I was spontaneous, silly and in the spotlight for at least that one moment in time. And that's enough for me.